However, this will not be a post about how much I miss her. I do. Greatly. But she was unwell and in a nursing home for so long and I live so far away that each time I went to Ohio and visited her, I would say goodbye just in case. This went on for years (Grandma was quite the fighter!...) so my heart was more than well prepared to let her go.
This will not be a post about how much my grandmother touched my life. Please do not mistake that sentence for saying that she didn't touch my life at all. I am a different woman because of her and only in the most incredible ways. She shaped so much of who I am and who I still desire to be.
But this will instead be a post about what my grandmother left behind. What she did not take with her into her grave. How the pinnacle of all the lessons I learned from her actually occurred after she had passed. (And I promise--this will not be a depressing post!)
It was the day of her funeral.
It was raining coldly. (Of course, because it was
The viewing was finished and the funeral was about to begin. Friends and extended family were gathered inside the church, while the immediately family waited outside in the lobby, ready to walk in following Grandma's casket. It was just Grandma's children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and all their spouses-- but there were So. Many. People! Grandma had four children, who then had ten grandchildren, who then had fifteen great-grandchildren (and more currently on the way!... NO, not from me...) Throw in the spouses of each of these and you have a group of over 40 people.
And all I could wonder was, Not a single person in this lobby would be standing here had it not been for my grandmother.
I'm one of those dreamers who really believes that just one person can change the world. Can you imagine the change that can be created by 40 people?
My grandma left behind amazing recipes, beautiful handcrafted quilts, and a 30-acre farm that is home to countless memories. But she will not be remembered for that like she will be remembered for the way she inspired, encouraged, loved, prayed for, and cared for the people around her. She had one of the kindest hearts that I've ever known and that's what will be her memory. Her legacy. Her impact and significance. While amazing and tasty-- a recipe will only go so far. While cozy and intricate-- a quilt can only do so much. Lasting change is made by people. To create enduring impressions, my grandmother invested in the people around her. She cherished her children and grandchildren. She adored her husband better than any girl on a chick flick can replicate. And she loved the Lord her God with all her heart, soul and mind.
And because of this, I am different. Her family is different. The friends and neighbors and loved ones in her life are different.
Therefore, by changing little bits of people's hearts, itty bitty pieces at a time, my grandmother has changed the world. And she will live on, first inside of me, and then inside of everyone who follows thereafter.
Here's to you, Grandma. And all that is different now because of your amazing spirit. I've been singing your favorite hymn over and over ever since your passing, and I love that for every day you've been gone, you've no less days to sing His praise. ❤ Love you.
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| The current message on the chalkboard in our kitchen. For my Grandma. ❤ (Click to enlarge) |
And I love you, too, sweet readers!
Agape,
CC
In case you are interested, here is the "unconventional" eulogy my sweet cousin and I wrote together and read at her funeral.
Ruth lived a long life filled to the brim with love, hard work, and family. She was raised in east Dayton and graduated from Stivers High School. In 1942, she married Clarence (Perk) and through 61 years of marriage, they remained devoted, faithful, and adorably in love. They worked hard together building homes, maintaining farms, and raising four children while living in the Dayton area.
Five thousand hand planted trees and a cozy glider swing-- that's what greeted you when you went to visit Ruth and Perk at their farm. Walking into the kitchen revealed the unmistakable embrace of homemade care. There were always oatmeal cookies in Ruth's cookie jar and a container of her famous jam to be retrieved from the basement.
From winning square dancing titles with her husband all around the country, to beating all her relatives in Euchre, (her favorite superstition: if you were losing, just get up and walk around your chair), Ruth was full of life and joy. She also enjoyed making beautiful quilts, goofing around with her grandchildren, and hosting great family events, including the annual Easter egg hunt.
Faith was a prominent part of Ruth's life. Together, she and Perk were charter members of St. Luke Catholic Church. When you held her hands in church during the "Our Father," they would be so very cold, but she'd just smile and say, "Cold hands; warm heart." And with that simple sentence, she described herself perfectly,
Today, she is succeeded by her four children, ten grandchildren, and fifteen great-grandchildren. Ruth leaves behind a legacy of faith, love, just the right amount of stubbornness, and unmatched kindness. Ruth will be missed but never forgotten because she has certainly planted herself in our hearts forever.
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